So many people have been asking me why I quit mid-way. And a small number is also curious to know why I refused to take up a job for a while.
Let me begin at the beginning. And this is one record, off the record, whichever way you look at it because there is none other. I was fed up. I was fed up of what I and everybody else around me was dishing out in the name of journalism day after day. We were all glorified clerks, rushing for a story - please, please, any quote will do -- and dashing it off before the deadline.
We had this list of usual suspects we always spoke to for a quote. There were activists, doctors, lawyers, officials, politicians, even industrialists who were ever ready to give us a byte or quote. They made up the dial-a-quote diary. And believe me, they are all psychos, crazy to see their name in print.
Each one of us is guilty of making heroes and heroines out of them. Shabana Azmi is one. Shobha de is another. Pritish Nandy is the third. There are many more whom I dare not name for I too have used them often.
That's what eventually go to me. That I was writing worthless crap and the paper wanted me to write ONLY worthless crap.
Add to that a totally Worthless Person to coordinate work with and I threw my hands up.
Call it mid-career frustration. I didnt give it up all at once; I tried to set things right, complained that we need to get some quality into the paper. But then, no paper was talking about quality, so why us? Nobody was listening. All they said was relax, we will change things, we will change the WP, we will not let you leave. That was their bottomline. Mine was change everything.
As I had been ill the year before, I was already low on patience and felt like a break. I could have jumped from one frying pan into another, but didnt want to. AT ALL.
So, after months and months of hesitation at the idea of being without a job, I simply quit.
The sabbatical has been the best thing that ever happened to me. It did me a world of good, refreshed my spirits, nourished my soul, recharged my batteries and got me doing things I wanted to. All sorts of people came with all sorts of really flattering offers, and I picked what suited me. Now, I am not talking about those right here but basically, I realised there is a whole world out there which you havent explored.
So, if anyone out there thinks a job is the only way to live, get a life.